When Everything Feels Like Too Much: Understanding Overstimulation in High-Achieving Women

By Dr. Lauren Chase, LCMHC

There is a particular kind of overwhelm that many high-achieving women experience. It is not the standard stress that comes from a busy season or a long week. It is a full body, full mind intensity that makes even small tasks feel unbearable. Lights feel too bright. Noise feels too loud. Conversations feel draining. Your mind feels scattered and overloaded. You feel irritated or anxious for reasons you cannot articulate.

This is overstimulation, and it is more common than people realize. For many high-achieving women, especially those with ADHD tendencies or sensory sensitivity, overstimulation is one of the biggest barriers to feeling calm, present, and grounded.

You may be juggling a career, parenting, household responsibilities, friendships, and community obligations. You may also be carrying the emotional and mental load that often falls on women. When everything is coming at you at once, your brain and body reach a point where they simply cannot process any more input.

This long form guide explores what overstimulation is, how it affects high-achieving women, and how you can begin creating more steadiness and ease in your day-to-day life.

What Is Overstimulation?

Overstimulation happens when your brain receives more sensory information than it can process at one time. This includes:
• Noise
• Visual clutter
• Interruptions
• Strong emotions
• Bright lights
• Screens
• Notifications
• Simultaneous conversations

Your nervous system becomes overwhelmed, and your body shifts into survival mode.

Examples of overstimulation triggers:
• Trying to work while your children are talking or moving around you
• Being in crowded or chaotic environments
• Managing multiple tasks with no transition time
• Being constantly interrupted
• Having too many responsibilities competing for your attention
• Loud or unexpected noises
• High emotional intensity

For women who already have ADHD or heightened sensitivity, your brain may process stimulation differently. This means overstimulation happens faster and hits harder.

How Overstimulation Shows Up in High-Achieving Women

Overstimulation does not always look like panic. It often appears in subtle but powerful ways.

1. Irritability or snapping easily

You are normally patient and composed, but suddenly everything feels like too much.

2. Feeling trapped or overwhelmed

Simple moments feel suffocating. You need space, quiet, or a break immediately.

3. Trouble focusing

Your mind bounces between tasks. You cannot finish what you start.

4. Physical tension

Tight shoulders, clenched jaw, headaches, or stomach discomfort.

5. Emotional flooding

You feel panicked, tearful, or stuck even when nothing is objectively wrong.

6. Brain fog

Your thoughts feel scattered or heavy, and decision making becomes difficult.

7. Needing to withdraw

You want to hide in your car, bathroom, or bedroom for a few minutes of peace.

Overstimulation is not a sign that you cannot handle life. It is a sign that your nervous system is overloaded and needs support.

Why High-Achieving Women Are Especially Vulnerable

High-achieving women often hold multiple roles and responsibilities. You may be a parent, partner, colleague, leader, friend, caregiver, and emotional support system all at once. When these roles overlap without space or structure, overstimulation becomes almost inevitable.

Here are common reasons high achievers experience overstimulation:

1. You stay busy to stay in control

Activity feels safer than stillness, so you push through exhaustion.

2. You underestimate your own sensory load

You are used to managing a thousand things at once. You do not always recognize when your sensory capacity is maxed out.

3. You carry the mental load

Planning, anticipating, remembering, organizing, and tracking everything makes your brain constantly active.

4. You rarely get true downtime

Even restful moments are interrupted by responsibilities, notifications, or worry.

5. You were conditioned to be the strong one

You push through discomfort until your body forces you to stop.

6. You experience ADHD traits

Difficulty transitioning, sensory sensitivity, emotional intensity, and executive functioning demands all contribute to overstimulation.

These patterns are understandable. They are also changeable.

The Link Between Overstimulation and Emotional Dysregulation

Overstimulation and emotional dysregulation often go hand in hand. When your sensory system is overloaded, your emotional system becomes less flexible. This is why small inconveniences can feel like major crises and why emotional responses can feel out of proportion.

Examples of this link:
• Your child asks for a snack while you are cooking and you feel a surge of irritation
• Your partner asks a question right when your brain is already overloaded and you snap
• You try to multitask and suddenly forget everything you were doing
• One unexpected noise sends your body into fight or flight

Your nervous system is not malfunctioning. It is overwhelmed.

How to Reduce Overstimulation and Create More Calm

You do not need to rearrange your entire life to feel a difference. The goal is to reduce the volume of stimuli coming at you and build intentional rest into your nervous system.

Below are evidence based strategies I use with clients.

1. Identify Your Overstimulation Triggers

Start by noticing when your body shifts from calm to tense.

Common triggers include:
• Multiple conversations at once
• Loud spaces
• Cluttered environments
• Constant interruptions
• Too many responsibilities at once
• Long periods without breaks

Awareness helps you respond instead of react.

2. Use Two Minute Sensory Resets

These short grounding practices help your brain reset and reduce internal overwhelm.

Try:
• Holding something cold in your hand
• Turning down lights or stepping into a darker room
• Splashing cool water on your face
• Putting your hands under warm water
• Deep pressure by hugging a pillow or pressing your palms together
• Slow exhale breathing

When done consistently, these resets help lower the overall intensity of your nervous system.

3. Create Predictable Transitions Between Tasks

High achievers often jump from one task to another without pause. This increases sensory and cognitive overload.

Try building in:
• One minute of breathing
• Standing and stretching
• Changing the environment
• Putting your phone away
• Quick journaling

Transition rituals help your brain shift gears more smoothly.

4. Reduce Cognitive Load

Your brain has a limited capacity for decision making. Reducing cognitive load protects your mental energy and reduces overstimulation.

Examples:
• Meal planning
• Simplifying your morning routine
• Using a weekly checklist instead of daily decision making
• Putting common tasks on autopilot
• Outsourcing where possible

Less mental clutter equals less sensory overload.

5. Create an Evening Wind Down Routine

Your body needs cues that it is safe to relax. A calming evening routine helps signal that the day is ending.

Your wind down routine might include:
• Turning off screens
• Dim lighting
• Calming music
• A warm shower
• Light stretching
• Reading
• Journaling

Your nervous system responds well to consistency.

6. Limit Multi-Tasking

Multi-tasking dramatically increases cognitive load, stress, and overstimulation. Focus on one thing at a time whenever possible.

Strategies:
• Use timers
• Block your schedule
• Close tabs
• Put your phone in another room
• Create a “later list” for intrusive thoughts

Single tasking creates more focus and less overwhelm.

7. Communicate Your Sensory Needs

Let your partner, children, or coworkers know when you need space or quiet.

You can say:
"I need a moment to reset my brain."
"I am feeling overstimulated and need a few minutes."
"I can talk in a moment, but I need silence right now."

Small communication shifts reduce emotional explosions later.

What Happens When You Manage Overstimulation More Effectively

When high-achieving women learn to regulate overstimulation, the benefits are immediate and powerful.

You may notice:
• More patience
• Less reactivity
• Better focus
• More emotional control
• Greater sense of grounding
• Fewer sensory meltdowns
• Better communication with your family
• More clarity about your needs

Your life begins to feel calmer and more manageable. You feel more like yourself.

Helpful Resources to Support Your Nervous System

Books

• Unmasking Autism by Devon Price
• Burnout by Emily and Amelia Nagoski
• The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

Tools

• Noise reducing headphones
• Weighted blankets
• Blue light glasses
• Visual timers
• Task management apps

Therapy Tools I Use With Clients

• Nervous system regulation work
• ADHD coping strategies
• Emotional regulation training
• Boundary setting
• Sensory awareness practices

If you want customized worksheets for daily regulation, I can create those for you.

Final Thoughts

If you are frequently overstimulated, it does not mean you are failing. It means your nervous system has been working harder than it was designed to work. You deserve tools, support, and a life that feels calmer and less chaotic.

You can learn how to regulate your sensory system.
You can learn to set limits with what drains you.
You can create more space for rest, presence, and ease.
And you do not have to push through overwhelm alone.

Ready to Feel More Grounded and Less Overwhelmed?

If overstimulation is taking over your day-to-day life, I can help you understand what is happening inside your nervous system and teach you strategies to feel more steady and regulated.

You deserve support that helps you feel calmer, more focused, and more in control.

Schedule your free 15 minute consultation to start the process.